More Gratitude Give Me / Jalan-jalan to Singapore

Namah berita?

Beritah baik? Maneh. That's pretty much all the Iban I know, but that's okay. 

"Render all the thanks and praise which your whole soul has power to possess, to that God who has created you, and has kept and preserved you, and has caused that ye should rejoice...I say unto you if ye shall serve him who has created you from the beginning, and is preserving you from day to day, by lending you breath, that ye may live and move according to your own will, and even supporting you from one moment to another-- I say if ye should serve him with all your whole souls yet ye would be unprofitable servants."

Obviously, since it's November, I've been thinking about all the things I'm grateful for. And I cut out a turkey out of paper and the Sisters and I are adding feathers with what we're grateful for every day.

Has it already been over 3 months since I walked through the doors at the MTC? It all feels like a dream but it also feels like yesterday. I get to pakai airplane this week and go to zone conference! It's about that time where we missionaries renewed our visas. The missionaries in West Malaysia and Singapore just had their zone conference. I saw a picture and all of the Elders from my MTC group look so happy. Our zone conference is all the missionaries in East Malaysia. And Mikel, I'm flying on a Boeing 737 (I'll try to get pictures) and I have a layover in Kuching on the way to Singapore but a layover in KL (Kuala Lumpur) on the way back. I'm excited to see Singapore again, it's a whole different animal from East Malaysia.

President and Sister Mains visited Miri this weekend and inspected our home, and I got to have my first interview with President since the day I landed in Singapore. He is so humble and does so much to make this mission move forward. He said Heavenly Father is mindful of me and my concerns, mission-wise and personal. I really needed to hear that. I cried pretty much the whole interview, he and his wife have such a special spirit about them. When I bore my testimony to him (crying like a baby, which is weird because I haven't cried so hard my entire mission) I said I was grateful for the privilege God gives me to see His children change, even though I'm not a perfect missionary or perfect teacher. Or a perfect person. I've seen miracles and have seen people have so much joy as they learn about their Savior Jesus Christ. The Mains were happy because apparently, that day was the cleanest they've ever seen "The Miri Mansion," as it's called in the mission. I'm really grateful for the beautiful home we get to live in, but I also wouldn't mind living in a little wooden house on the river like the Ibans do.

Last week, Nayan, one of our investigators, showed us her brand new dress she bought for church. She looked so pretty on Sunday. One of her older sons, Subyia, was able to come to church too because he had work off! And her other two older kids, Stanley and Shetu, said they can come next week because they asked their bosses if they could have work off to go to church. I had one of my favorite lessons with them this week; Stanley and Subyia are really struggling with stopping smoking, so Sister LeBaron and I were planning their lesson and were thinking, 'What do they need? They need to know they are sons and daughters of God, who loves them a lot and because He loves them, they can stop smoking!" So we taught them just that. They are royalty in God's eyes, kings and queens. I told them "Dengan Yesus Kristus, kamu tidak dapat gaggal." (With Jesus Christ, you CANNOT fail." I redid Stanley's stop smoking plan, and I saw that there were tears in his eyes. So many people don't know their worth. I never get tired of telling people how important they are.

Also, Irak and Wynndy, Brother Chaong's son-in-law and daughter, said they would go to church if they could get work off. The whole time we've been teaching them, they would say, "No we're still going to the Roman Catholic church," or "Tidak janji," (not promising), to "Tangoklah" (we'll see) to "We'll go if we can get work off." And they meant it. Last night we taught them about the Word of Wisdom, and I shared that I was grateful for my health because Sister LeBaron and I bike jauh (far) every day, and we wouldn't be able to do God's work if we weren't healthy. Plus it's really fun asking good, upstanding people and little kids not to do drugs. When they say, "Okay, I won't do drugs," Sister LeBaron and I say "Whew! We were so worried about you!" But then again, for some people we teach, it's a real struggle.

I have way too many things to be grateful for, if there is such a thing. I've lived a happy, privileged life. I have had so many opportunities to grow, to learn, and to have fun. I am grateful every day that I get to wake up in beautiful Malaysia and think about how I can help people grow closer to God. I get to see people change into better people.

Brother Simon and Brother Horman, I know I drove you crazy sometimes because of my inability to berfocus (Sister LeBaron is pretty sure I have ADD) but you gave me everything I need to become a successful missionary. Everything. Thank you for the advice, for being patient with me and my district, and for giving us tough love when we needed it. I can tell you were exceptional missionaries, and your Malay is awesome (even though Brother Simon taught us ghetto Malay, we're a little more classy over here in Miri. Not as classy as KK though). I hope I can become like the missionaries you were by the time I'm done with my mission. I have no problem saying you were some of the best teachers at the MTC. Brother Pulver, Brother Blissett, and Sister Harrison, you too. Know that all of you have made my mission better.

I'm also grateful for all of the home teachers, Sunday school teachers, and young women teachers I've had while I was growing up. At times, it was stressful uncluttering our house for it to be presentable enough for the home teachers to come over, and sometimes I was annoyed with all the activities I was invited to in Young Women's. But all of you visited and supported me and my family because you love us. I'm forever grateful for Brother and Sister Kirby, Brother and Sister Plant, Sister Papritz, Brother and Sister Kelly, Brother Wadsworth (the best seminary teacher ever. Seriously seminary was what made high school bearable), Sister Hale, Sister Hewson, Sister Keck, Sister Rudolph, and everyone else. I know I'm forgetting so many people. But know that if you ever taught me, I'm grateful for you.

Mom and dad, where to even begin? I can't say enough to express how much you mean to me. I thank God every day that I was lucky enough to get you have you as my parents. I'm grateful you let me make my own decisions, my own mistakes, and I'm glad you emphasize the importance of having experiences (like getting on a plane to Malaysia). You taught me how to be a good person, and then had enough faith that what you taught me and my siblings was enough. I'm grateful that when I washed back up on your doorstep last December, that you embraced me and comforted me, and when I said I wanted to serve a mission, you said, "We can make that happen."

Mikel and Cloe, my eternal best friends. You're a couple of the very few people I feel like understand me. Thank you for the letters and emails. I love telling people all about you, and they say you are very handsome and pretty respectively.

I was thinking about how I do things for the people I love, like my family. Dad, when you ask me to rake the leaves in the yard, I do it (most of the time). Or clean the gutters, or mow the lawn. Or make sure the kitchen's clean at the end of the day for mom. I would take a bullet for Mikel and Cloe. But mostly I just buy slushies for you in the summer. And you do the same for me. Why? Because I love you all.

Sister LeBaron taught me this week that that's the most important reason why we should follow the commandments of God. Because we love Him. He gives us so much, and in return, all He asks is to follow His commandments which are supposed to protect us in the first place. He even gave us an example to follow, Jesus Christ, because we still needed help learning how to follow commandments, haha.

I love the Miri district of missionaries. I love singing with everyone at district meetings because everyone knows the harmonies to all the hymns, so I feel like I'm on an episode of Sunny, when they randomly sing a capella. When Sister Noorda was bearing her testimony at the end of her mission, and reflecting on all of it, I wrote in my planner in all caps, "I WILL MISS THIS WHEN IT'S OVER." I know I still have more time than not on my mission, but I know it will go by too fast and then before I know it I'll be at PDX again. It gave me a renewed enthusiasm to work hard everyday, and to throw myself into missionary work.

More about the culture here, in the kampungs, when there are a lot of houses connected together, the kids are taken care of by all the moms. I still have no idea whose kids are whose with some of the families we're teaching. It's pretty smart though. And the kids just wander in from a different dwelling to the ones we teach. I usually have to ask, "Is this one yours? No? Whose kid is this? Oh okay."

I still love sitting on the floor in a circle to teach. It's rude to walk over someone's legs, and rude to walk through the circle of people, so you have to go around the edge behind everyone, or if you absolutely HAVE to walk in the middle of everyone, you kind of stoop over and put your hand in front of you. It's fun, I love doing that. Also, the addresses and genealogy is a MESS. No one has real addresses, so keeping our area book up to date is fun. Also, there are no maps of Miri. We've asked gas stations and book stores and the people there just kind of give us a weird look. And people's last names are their dad's first names, so I would be Ellen anak (child of) Todd. And my dad would be Todd anak Ross. But if my dad was a deadbeat, I would be Ellen anak Hideko. So family history work is really hard to do here. 

Everyone wears their religion on their sleeves, their hearts, and on their doors. It makes it easy to know who we can legally teach. If they have Chinese characters, they're Buddhist, or if they have a picture of Jesus or Mary on their door, we're good to go. If they have lights on their gutters, no go. We don't want to get arrested. Since Malaysia is a Muslim country, there are SO many places to buy cute, modest clothes. I want to buy my whole wardrobe here.

Missions are fun. They're hard. I love it here, I might never want to leave.

Forever grateful for everything. Jumpa lagi,

Sister Wynn

God Speaks Iban / Ngian's Baptism

Hey hey saudara and saudari,

This week was busy. Missionary life is busy. I wish I had more time to study, write letters, and write in my journal. Today, for P-Day, Sister LeBaron and I are taking it easy because we're exhausted. Every morning I wake up and everything hurts, but I somehow manage to roll over and say my morning prayers. It's the good kind of hurt, like I'm doing something important with these 18 months I've been given to be a missionary. Or trying to at least. I promise I'm working as hard as I can. It is not requisite that a man run faster than he has strength. But I also know I've been given more strength and energy.

First, Ngian got baptized! She was so happy and excited all week. On Friday, the day before her baptism, the Elders informed us there was something wrong with the baptismal font and after they drained it from last week's baptism, some of the dirty water backed up into the font. Elder Snyder and Elder Shuetz, the best zone leaders ever, went to the church for a couple hours and stood in knee-deep gross water and Elder Snyder tried to clear the drainage pipe (elbow deep in hair, dirt, plastic, and all the sins that have been washed away from baptisms past.) They also tried siphoning the water out, but to no avail. The next day, Sister LeBaron and I, along with the new Sisters, went to drain the rest of the water by bucket and clean the font a little so it would be ready for Ngian. There was a Relief Society activity finishing up from Branch 1, and they offered to help drain and clean the font! The work went by in no time, and Ngian was there to help and I think she really appreciated seeing all the church members support her.

The evening of the baptism, Elder Snyder and Elder Shuetz got us food since we had to stay with the font for it to fill up, and make the programs. Then Elder Snyder refused to let me pay him back. Best zone leaders ever? I think so. Ngian's baptism went by without a hitch, even though at the beginning of the day, nothing seemed to be  working. For example, our printer wasn't working for the programs, and we couldn't get a hold of the branch president all week to preside. All of those things ended up working out. Ngian was confirmed yesterday, and right after church, she came with us to be our church member present in a couple of our lessons with investigators. She shared her testimonies about prayer and the Book of Mormon. 

She was so shy when we met her, but now all she does is exude confidence and joy. I learned how to say "I love you" (Saya sayang kamu) and "I'm always sad when I leave your house because it has a special spirit" (Saya selalu sedih untuk berpindah rumah kamu sebab rumah ini ada roh istimewa) just for her. I love how in Malay, there are two different ways to say love, sayang, which is what you say to your friends and family, and cinta, which is the romantic kind of love. That way, it's not weird telling the families we're teaching that we love them. People say it all the time. If I had advice to give to a new missionary learning a language, I would say tell and show the people you're working with that you love them and care about them. That you're excited to see them, and that you're excited and happy they're becoming closer to God. Learn how to say all of that in your mission language.

I also wanted to talk about a conversation I had with Nayan, one of our investigators. We're teaching her and 6 of her kids. Her husband is sudah menginggal (passed away). She was telling us she loves praying, but she's a little malu (embarrassed, shy, apprehensive) because she's better at speaking in Iban than Malay and isn't sure if God likes that.

"Nayan," I said, laughing a little, "God speaks Iban."

She's been coming to church all month, but yesterday, she came to all three hours, and Sister Loreen was teaching Relief Society and taught it in Iban! I think it made Nayan a lot more comfortable at church. I introduced her to tons of people while Sister LeBaron was getting signatures for Ngian's baptism form. And dad, don't worry, Iban and Malay share a lot of words so I'm still learning Malay. I know a couple words in Iban too so I can tell people they're awesome and that I love them.

One other thing, Brother Chaong, a really sweet Iban man that looks like an owl, is the only church member in his family, but right now we're teaching his wife, daughter, son-in-law, and grandkids because they said they were ready this time. And they all believe the Book of Mormon is true and love reading from it. Brother Chaong showed us his passport and he got passports for his whole family, and has saved up enough money to go to the Philippines Manila Temple for when they all get baptized. It was so sweet. I almost cried when he shared that with us.  

Who knew I lived only 15 minutes away from bike from the beach? I sure didn't. The beach is pretty. The water is dirty, I can't decide if it's better or worse than California. Our district biked on the sand to check out some tide pools. I decided I should bike on beaches more. It's hard but really fun. I biked through where a small stream meets the ocean, but didn't time it right so a wave came in and my shoes and shorts got soaked. It was pretty funny. It was our last P-Day with Elder Conners and Sister Noorda, who sudah habis-ed their missions, and Sister Thompson, who got transferred to Kuching. I went on splits with Sister Thompson last week, and I'm grateful I got to know her better. She's still an Asister/Sister Training leader. She showed us her area and houses of people she and Sister Noorda were working with to show the new Sisters who are white washing Lutong. Then on Saturday, before Ngian's baptism, we showed Sister Caballa, and Sister Anderson, the trainee, their area.

Sister LeBaron warned me that sometimes when there are two sisters being trained living in the same house, that it gets competitive with the language. But Sister Anderson is way cool, she's from New Zealand, half Chinese, and is already fluent in Chinese so it's no contest. She speaks Malay with a New Zealand accent which is awesome. Sister Caballa was at BYUH the year I was there. I forgot to mention Elder Fletcher, the new Chinese elder, but he's been here for a month already (the Chinese Elders are on a different transfer schedule from the Malay and English speaking missionaries). He's from Ogden, Utah. His whole family is inactive, but he's a stellar missionary. Elder Wayment is training Elder Christensen. He's from Utah...somewhere but is sweet. Half of the missionaries in Miri are being trained. It's awesome. We have that special greenie power that's half enthusiasm and half naivety. I hope I never lose it.

What else? Brother Chaong's house is the only one we go to where we don't sit on the floor in a circle. All the women in Malaysia are gorgeous. The Miri accent is pretty, they pronounce "i" at the end of words like an "e". So instead of "terima kasih" and "cantik," it's "terima kas-eh" and "can-tek." Something like that. The church members love me now because in between sessions of general conference, I ate tons of food, and Malaysians like big eaters. I think I may have told you that already. Our landlady is a really sweet Chinese woman who gives us food because, as she says, "I noticed you don't have a mom." She still thinks we're school teachers even though we've explained a million times that we're volunteers for our church haha. Everyone here is so loving. Oh and Malaysians love to tease you, so you have to learn how to do it back. And dad, I know you were wondering how I teach abut Christ in a Muslim country where it's illegal to teach Muslims. It's actually pretty easy. When I'm on the bus or talking to people, I say, "I'm from America, if you couldn't tell. I'm a volunteer for my church." (We're not supposed to say we're missionaries because it implies we're getting paid). Then I say "What religion are you? Oh, Muslim? That's really cool! Can you teach me more Malay words?"

Easy. Love you all.

-Sister Wynn

Brethren in the Lord / Getting mauled by a baby sunbear

"Therefore, Sister Wynn did rejoice exceedingly to see her brethren, and what added more to her joy, they were still her brethren in the Lord; yea, and they had waxed strong in the knowledge of the truth, for they were men of a sound understanding and they had searched the scriptures diligently, that they might know the word of God.

But this is not all, they had given themselves to much prayer and fasting, therefore they had the spirit of prophesy, and the spirit of revelation, and when they taught, they taught with the power and authority of God."

The best Christmas presents I've ever gotten as a little kid (top three: my hamster, guitar, and barbie spa) pale in comparison to finding out I was flying to Kuching for new missionary training and got to see the Elders from my MTC group. Well, the ones being trained in East Malaysia at least. Pale.

Sister LeBaron and I hopped on a plane in Miri around 9 am (it was a Boeing 737 Mikel) and an hour later, landed in the beautiful, enormous city of Kuching. It was a 15 minute cab ride to the church, but the gate was locked so we had our driver (his name is Vincent, he told us all the cool things to see in Kuching) drop us off at the huge mall next door so we could eat and kill some time before training started.

We saw Elder Capener and Elder Hays, his trainer first, as we were walking to the food court. Imagine the happiest you've ever seen me, and multiply it by 10. I ran up to Elder Capener and gave him the most enthusiastic handshake ever. We caught up and I told him I heard they were tearing it up in Sibu. Elder Capener has always had the Malay accent down. We went back to the church, and I saw Elder Parker and his trainer in the church parking lot. I yelled "Elder Parker!" and he said, "Oh, hey Sister Wynn." as he unlocked the gate for us. He's still the same free spirit. It was like another day for him since he's serving in Kuching right now.

In the church, I saw to Elder Fowler, serving in the middle-of-nowhere Mukah, and Elder Hobbs (Kuching), and then Elders Liddle, Ormsby, and Cook and their trainers pulled up in a couple cabs. They're all serving in Bintulu.

I ran up to Elder Liddle and said I'd give him a hug if I could (I told all the Elders that) and that my district in Miri wrote him a card. The week before, my zone leaders asked if he'd like a card since I'm the only one that really knows him, and I said he would appreciate the gesture, and even if he didn't like it, he would still say he did because that's the kind of person he is. I asked how he was feeling and he said, "You know, I'm doing all right." I told him I love him, and Miri loves him.

I got to see Elder Ferguson and Elder Lundquist (serving in Kuching, but the other side so they had a 16 mile bike ride) at the mall where we ate lunch. Everyone had either lost weight (in a good way) or gained weight in muscle. I was glad because we were all looking pretty tubby after the MTC haha.

After lunch, we saw President and Sister Mains and the APs, and it was nice to see them. I knew training was important, otherwise why would the mission president fly us all in from where we were serving? Everything they said was inspired, and I loved learning that missions (and life) are about joy, and that we can continually improve. I forgot my notes but I'll send some of them next week. We also split up for a while, trainees and trainers, and the trainees talked to President and Sister Mains about what we like about training and what we want to see different. We have a good group, and they could see we were all very energetic and willing to work hard, and all of our trainers have been doing a good job giving us a lot of responsibility and experience speaking and teaching. Some of the Elders said their trainers on the first day handed them the phone and said, "Okay, make all the appointments today." Sister LeBaron said a couple trainers in her group were feeling discouraged, and complaining about their trainees. Elder Crosland, one of the APs, cut him off and said, "Pray more."

At the end of training, we had a brief testimony meeting, and Elder Liddle stood up and bore a powerful testimony that he's grateful for eternal families, and that's why he's here serving so people can know they can see with their loved ones again.He didn't cry but Sister LeBaron and I did (of course, the only two sisters at this training meeting cried). Didn't I say in my last email that Elder Liddle is a strong person? On the card I gave him from my district, I wrote that he's incredible for exemplifying the character of Christ. Despite losing his dad, he turned outward in service to others, instead of turning inward. I pray for him every day, even though I know he'll be okay. I hope one day I can be like him. After training, he even did his voice impersonations when I asked him to show Sister LeBaron.

It's incredible to see how much these Elders, my friends, and brethren in the Lord have changed in 5 short weeks. They're still themselves, but I think we're all better teachers, and have so much love for the people we serve. We were so excited to talk about the people we've been teaching all over East Malaysia. But at the same time, we're all still a little bit the same. When I showed Elder Parker my pictures with the sunbear, he said, "That's such a Sister Wynn laugh." I love my mission. I can't wait to see how much we all change after 2 years.

Sister LeBaron and I caught a ride back to the airport with the APs, Elder Harper and Elder Crosland (selfie pics in the cab forthcoming) because we were the only ones flying home that night (the APs back to Singapore). We ate at Marrybrown's, which was the first time I had fast food in a long time, and said our good byes. I made sure to tell the APs they were good examples of what a Preach My Gospel missionary is, and that we appreciated all the work they do, because being an AP must be pretty thankless sometimes. Sister LeBaron and I got home, back in Miri, at 11 pm and crashed. Friday was a good day. Long day.

The next morning, we woke up at 7 am, like usual, but so sore and exhausted. During exercise, all I did was lay there with my legs in the air and said to Sister LeBaron, "How do President Mains, the APs, Zone Leaders, and ASisters do this every week?" But the night before, in my prayers, I said, "Heavenly Father, I'm tempted to sleep in tomorrow because I'm running on no sleep, but I'm gonna get up on time. Please help me get through tomorrow and teach with the spirit and be happy." And I was.

Well last P-Day, we went to the Crocodile Farm. I got to see the ocean from the bus (today is beach day) and I got to hold a baby sunbear! You know you're jealous. I got to play with a lot of jungle animals that day actually. I was like a kid in a candy store.

Ngian is getting baptized this Saturday, and she is ready and excited! I love how much her confidence has grown since she learned and accepted the gospel. She was so shy and quiet (a lot of Iban/Asian women are) at first, and now she's so talkative. I always tell her I'm sad to leave our lessons at her house and she says she is too.

A little about the culture (email me questions about what you want to know), most of our investigators and everyone, really, live in kampongs, the neighborhoods with wooden houses. Most of them are built over the Miri River. Sister Tungalim was telling us yesterday that every year their house floods a little as the river rises. Some people have generators for their electricity, others just use candles at night. I love teaching lessons by candlelight.

The people here like to tease the Elders, and sometimes the Sisters, but if you can tease them back they just love you more. They love me know because at General Conference, between sessions, I ate TONS of food (because I'm always hungry) and tried a little of the Malaysian/Iban dishes. They like big eaters. K I'm out of time, till next time.

I love Malaysia. I love Sarawak, and I love Pujut in Miri. I love these people with all my heart.

-Sister Wynn

I'm going to Kuching / I would give away all my sins to know thee / Rest in Peace, Brother Liddle

Selamat pagi (I guess petang for all of you in America),

My heart is heavy right now. Yesterday, after one of our lessons, Sister LeBaron told me she got a text from our zone leaders saying Elder Liddle's dad died of cancer. I had the opportunity to teach with Elder Liddle and his companion in the MTC and got to know him really well. He's just out of high school and has always been an exceptional missionary, even though he's 6'3" and skinny as a twig because he's only 18. He focused on studies when the rest of us couldn't, and spoke excellent Malay by the time we left. He made us all laugh. So much. Even with his own personal struggles. He didn't talk to me about his dad that often, but during a testimony meeting our second day at the MTC, he briefly mentioned how his dad has cancer, but he was really grateful for the support of church members and for the knowledge that we can be with our families forever. He is strong, always has been.

I had the privilege of seeing him talk to his dad on the phone at LAX, and I loved seeing him light up and tell him about his experiences at the MTC and about Bintulu (his first area). The other Elders we were with gave him a huge hug after. When the APs were in Miri a couple weeks ago, they told me things weren't looking very good for Elder Liddle's dad, and it made me really sad.

I also found myself at a funeral wake, and the next day a funeral, this week. We're not really sure how we ended up there, except that a less active woman, asked the church members for support. We got to know her better these last couple days and are going to continue to support her. Her mom died young, we think she was about 50, too young. She loves talking to Sister LeBaron and me about her mom. She also wants to start attending church again.

We also got pins last week at district meeting, with a Singapore and Malaysian flag, with the words

Elder Jason WiBerg

Singapore Mission

embossed on them. Rumor has it his parents had the pins made and sent to our mission for the missionaries. I never met Elder Wiberg, but all of the events this past week has gotten me thinking about life and death. I read Alma 40 this morning, and listened to some of the words at Dawn's wake. "The spirits of men, as soon as they are departed from this mortal body, yea, the spirits of all men, whether they be good or evil, are taken home to that God who gave them life...the spirits of those who are righteous are received into a state of happiness, which is called paradise, a state of rest, a state of peace, where they shall rest from all their troubles and from all care, and sorrow.

The soul shall be restored to the body, and the body to the soul; yea, and every limb and joint shall be restored to its body; yea, even a hair of the head shall not be lost; but all things shall be restored to their proper and perfect frame."

Death is not the end. Death is not the end.

I never get tired of teaching people that. A few weeks ago, as we were teaching the Plan of Salvation lesson to Ngian (the tiny Iban woman we love so much), Sister LeBaron was explaining how her body can be perfect. It won't ever be sakit (sick, hurt, in pain, it's all one word in bahasa Melayu) again. I started tearing up a little. I never get tired of telling people they can be with their loved ones forever and ever and ever. Elder Liddle's dad doesn't have cancer anymore. Claire's mom doesn't have chest pain anymore. Uncle Paul is fine and healthy. We don't need to worry about them.

I'm also grateful for tender little mercies from God. At church, Sister LeBaron said, "Sister Wynn, do you trust me?" and proceeded to share her plans to make a lot more appointments than we thought we had time for. "I trust you."

The two appointments we had after we got news of Elder Liddle's dad fell through, but I think Heavenly Father knew I needed the bike ride over to their houses to tear up a little and feel sad and think for a while before we had to go to our other appointments. I didn't really cry until an hour ago, while I was doing family history training on the computer and thinking about how families can be together forever. You have to imagine me sitting at an Internet kedai, bawling my eyes out, while there are 9 year olds running around screaming at their computer screens, playing Call of Duty.

Anyway, I've also been thinking about sins and being of the world. There's this prominent Miley Cyrus song that came out a month before I left, and I'm guilty of once loitering in a souvenir shop to listen to it. It's really stupid and worldly and catchy, but when I hear it, I get taken back to the wonderful summer I had, of driving to Gerrit's house, bonfires, trips to the coast, and swimming. But then I also had this resolve to buang (cast out) the things of the world for the rest of my life. There are so many things in the world that compete for my attention, and I'm tired of it.

I was also reading about the conversion of Saul recently, and you have to imagine Sister LeBaron trying to have a peaceful personal study and me bursting out laughing, because I read, "As for Saul, he made havoc of the church," and I had to explain to Sister LeBaron that I imagined Saul kacau-ing (harassing) these poor church members and said, "Man Saul, you used to be a real jerk." I know my personal conversion to the Lord wasn't on the same level as Saul's (like the Caravaggio painting portrays, the one where Saul has fallen off his horse as he is being converted), but I know God doesn't care who we were, He only cares where we're going and that we're doing our best to become more like Christ. Look at Saul, he was a real jerk, but became one of the best missionaries of all time.

I know I have been saved by Christ, and one thing I've been trying to learn this week is how the Atonement is about change. Heavenly Father wants us to change and become better. I know I've been asking Him to help me change, to cast out anything and everything worldly about myself. And I'm dumbfounded by how I make the same mistakes over and over, and God liberally forgives me when I come back with a broken heart and desire to change. Christ's grace is sufficient for me.

I loved General Conference. Some of my favorite things were when Elder Holland said, "Hope is never lost," and "If the bitter cup will not pass, drink it, and become strong." We are 15 million strong now, and there are 80,333 missionaries. I can't believe it's been one year since I was sitting on Austin's couch, crying with him because we both knew I was going on a mission. Why did I ever doubt my decision for so long to serve? Now that I'm here, I know I would do this mission all over again. How many times do the scriptures say "Doubt not," "Doubting nothing," etc? I'm glad I'm here, because if I wasn't, there would only be 80,332 missionaries serving right now, and every one of us count. And those of us without black name tags are missionaries too. We need each other to find people that need the Gospel of Jesus Christ right now.

In other news, I bought a giant bag of longan last week at E-Mart. Longan is so good. When I said, "Terima kasih!" to the farmer, he started laughing at me. I said in Malay, "Are you laughing at me because I have a white person accent?" and he just nodded and kept laughing. He was super cool though because he gave me more longan than I asked for for the same price. I also tried jackfruit for the first time. It's durian's distant cousin in the fruit family tree. Durian isn't in season right now, but when I try it, I'll be sure to share how nasty it is. I also ate a chicken foot at the wake. It was in this bowl of curry, and I was feeling pretty awkward (as I always do at wakes) so I shrugged and piled some curry and chicken feet onto my rice. It's very cartilage-y, and Elder Wayment had to teach me how to bite off the toes and eat the meat around the bones.

Speaking of Elder Wayment, we just found out we're 3rd cousins! His mom is a Purcell, so I'm pretty sure my dad is friends with his mom. Also, I got chased by dogs that can run faster than I can bike. Imagine me screaming and laughing, legs a blur because I'm pedaling so fast, and praying that these anging besar (huge dogs) won't catch me.

I also accidentally drank coffee. This golden family we are teaching right now gave it to us, and I wondered as I drank it, "This is really weird tasting Milo." Sister LeBaron decided not to drink it until after the lesson, and after she took a sip and realized it was coffee, looked over at me with wide eyes and saw that my glass was empty. At that lesson, I also felt a bug crawling under my leg and ignored it, but the family started freaking out and Stanley, one of the sons, smashed this millipede that crawled out from under my leg and explained that they have really painful bites. Dodged a bullet there. Stanley and his sister Shetu are so sweet, and they put their pictures on the inside cover of their Book of Mormon. I love how special this family is. We're trying to get the sons to stop smoking. We found out Subyia also smokes, and yesterday, I thought his mom was kidding, but he said he smokes a pack every two days. I was like, "Dude you're only 16!" But he's really excited to start his plan to stop. I'm always amazed at how willing people are to stop things (even coffee and tea) when we ask them to. I'm this inarticulate girl from America, yet they listen to me and Sister LeBaron and show us so much warmth and love. I love their house too because at night, we light candles so we can see since they don't have lights, like a lot of Iban homes.

I also bought a Malay and Iban Bible last week. It's awesome.

Okay, I'm out of time, but I love you all. Have a good week. Till next time.

-Sister Wynn

P.S. I'm going to Kuching this week for new missionary training! So stoked to see my homeboys from the MTC.

Heart, Might, Mind and Strength

Apa khabar,

So if you want a visual of my mission, imagine a quiet little street, palm trees swaying in the breeze, me in a pink dress riding my bike with no handlebars (I learned how to do that my second day in the field). Also, I'm wearing a dorky bike helmet and sweating profusely, all the time. And I always have this stupid grin on my face. This is my life. I love every second of it.

Happy [almost] Birthday mama-bear! You are incredible and if I can be half as good of a mom as you one day, I'd be pretty happy with myself. I'm glad I had time to send a personal email to the family.

Just in case any of you wanted to google-earth my area, I live in Lutong, by the EconSave/Myy Mall, but we bike across the Miri River every day to Pujut, our area. The church is next to the HSBC bank. I want to know how many miles I live away from the church. Last P-Day, our rides to the crocodile farm fell through, and today, it's raining really hard so we decided not to go again because we want to hold baby sunbears in our lap and feed monkeys, and they probably won't want to come out and play in the rain. Last week, the roommates and I went to downtown Miri and I finally got a little souvenir shopping done. I didn't buy much, but I bought a really pretty purple sarong. I love the sisters I live with, we are a really good house (which apparently that didn't always used to be the case). I also love my district. Yesterday, I made everyone gyros and we broke our fast at the church.  (You know you're jealous of my mad cooking skills). The Chinese speaking Elders and Sister LeBaron and I switch off making lunch (or dinner for fast Sundays) every week. A couple weeks ago I made everyone yakisoba.

That reminds me, we just found out Elder Fabiano is getting transferred to Singapore. He's the Italian-Hawaiian looking Elder in all of my pictures (which I will send...eventually). I thought I was the only compur (mix) in my district. He's a cool kid, and speaks perfect Chinese. He also started a weekly English class at the church. Sister LeBaron and I got roped into teaching the advanced class, and it's so much fun. They also find a lot of investigators this way. He tried speaking Iban to me once, he said, "Mama burrito," to which I said, "Uh, you mean 'nama berita'?" I can't make fun of him though because he was always nice enough to translate sacrament meeting during Chinese group so we could translate for the Indonesians that come. That's my ode to Elder Fabiano, he's going to go change some hearts now in Singapore. His trainee, Elder Mitchell (the redhead in all my pictures), is now going to train in Miri, so they will both be going to Singapore this week for Elder Mitchell to pick up the new guy.

I was really sad when the sister assistants (or asisters) came back from Singapore with no mail for me. I was a little disappointed in myself that I was kind of sad in the first place. I know it's not important to get letters, but I do love having those little reminders of home. I guess that's what I get for burning all my bridges before I left, haha. Sister LeBaron and I go running every morning, except there are angry dogs that chase us all over our neighborhood. It's good exercise though, and everything is less sore since we've started running, especially my back.

In other news, we have a security guard for the church at night, or I should say we used to because he died last Monday! His name was Dason Dixon, but the missionaries called him Boss, and he was this really sweet Muslim guy. We always thanked him for keeping our church safe. When the new security guard told us, I started laughing, and Sister LeBaron gave me this mortified look. I (my whole family, actually) handle death in a highly inappropriate way...by laughing. Don't judge me.

We also ended up teaching this drunk guy, who was the neighbor of one of our less actives. He desired to change because he doesn't like how angry he gets when he drinks, so we taught him the Word of Wisdom lesson right then and there. Except he kept interrupting me, and he kept talking in circles. I said, "Okay, when we teach you next time, you aren't allowed to be drunk. Promise?"

I can't remember if I talked about the miracle where we found this less active family, and the miracles that followed. Sister LeBaron and I were looking for a totally different family, and we biked by these little girls who were playing. I thought I heard one of them yell, "Sisters!" so I called Sister LeBaron back, and we talked to them. I said, "How did you know we were called Sisters?" and they let us into their house and it turned out they were a less active family! The mom's name is Karen, and her daughter Teo is the most beautiful 12-year old I've ever seen. She's half Iban and half Chinese. Karen can't talk because she has a throat sickness, but wrote on a piece of paper that she wants the missionaries to teach her kids. Her friends, Bangi and Linthia, came over right then, and we asked if they wanted to learn. They said yes and were stoked on their Book of Mormons we gave them. Wait, it gets better; while Sister LeBaron and Sister Thompson went to teach Bangi and Linthia on our exchanges, another family, Nayan and her kids, who live in the same house, wanted to learn. So we've been teaching them (there's 9 of them total) and they love being taught about the gospel. A couple nights ago, we taught that they can become perfect, and have perfect bodies again, and be with their families forever. Shetu, the oldest daughter, who is 23, the night before had cried and told us she knew she had been saved by Jesus Christ. Then, during that lesson, she said Sister LeBaron and I had the face of God. I don't really know what that means, but it was sweet. I like to think Sister LeBaron and I have hope and optimism, and the light of Christ in our eyes.

Lately, I've been thinking about how amazing our generation is. We heard a talk in the MTC about how when we heard the invitation to the call to serve from President Monson last October, we said, "Yes we will!" And because of the huge number of missionaries (80,000 strong now), we said, "Oh, we only have 6 weeks to learn Malay instead of 9? Bring it on." I didn't realize that other missionaries would end up meaning so much to me. I have full faith in them as future leaders. Take Sister LeBaron for example; I didn't realize how difficult her training situation was-- She is whitewash training in a country she'd never actually been to (she spent her first 6 months in Singapore) in a language she never needed. My first day in Malaysia was her first day in Malaysia too. And she is doing an incredible job. This week, we had the most member-present lessons, most investigators at church, referrals contacted, and progressing investigators in our zone. Not because we're that great, we told each other it's times like these where we wish we could hi-five God. "I do not boast in my own strength nor in my own wisdom...but I will boast of my God." Maybe it's beginners luck, or maybe we are supposed to be teaching these people right now.

I've been studying D&C 4 and want to live it, "Therefore, O ye that embark in the service of God, see that ye serve him with all your heart, might, mind and strength."

I want to give my mission everything I have to give. I want to come home exhausted. Everything I teach, I know is true. 

-Sister Wynn

I feel like a real missionary now

Hey, I'm not sure if my email from last week sent, so here it is again:

Hey hey orang yang saya sayang,

First thing's first, what missionaries do here for handwritten letters is have the letters go to the Singapore address. It is:

Sister Ellen Wynn

Singapore Mission

253 Bukit Timah Road, 5th Floor

259690 Singapore

Singapore

It's also on my facebook cover photo if you forget. This means we only get mail about once a month or every 3 weeks. I think it's because the mail here isn't very reliable/no one really has addresses. Missionaries coming from Singapore to our area bring our letters and packages. Our Sister Training Leaders and ZLs are going to Singapore this week for leadership training, so they'll pick up our letters. Also, the APs flew in from Singapore this week, which means I got mail! Well, I only got one letter, from Brother Kirby, and it was so uplifting. Keep writing, missionaries love letters. Even if I don't get them right away, keep writing to me, promise? I will try to respond as soon as I can.

Well, I forgot to say last week that Sister Crichton got transferred to Kuching about 2 days after Sister LeBaron and I got here. It was fun trying to remember where everyone lived. Can I just say Sister LeBaron is a champ for white-wash training in a country she's never been in, and in a language she didn't really use much before? She spent the first 6 months of her mission in Singapore, where missionaries mostly speak English. I really appreciated Sister Crichton being here, but I'm kind of glad she's gone because I feel like I teach a lot more, and that's the best way to learn the language.

Also, we wake up at 7, and go to bed at 11 instead of 6:30 and 10:30 in most other missions. I don't know why it seems so much better, but it's awesome. Also, I waterproofed my backpack. And by that, I mean I stick all of my books and valuables in plastic bags. It's the cheap man's way to waterproof stuff. I learned my lesson from two P-Days ago from biking in the rain and all of my stuff got wet. I was just thinking how it hasn't rained since that day, then yesterday, Sister LeBaron and I left early to pick some less-actives up for church, and it poured the whole time we biked. I thought to myself, "I'm going to miss days like this." I also wore my hideous Crocs yesterday, and we were a little late to sacrament meeting, so you have to imagine everyone trying to be reverent in church and us walking in late, dripping wet, and the squelching sound of my shoes as I tried to find a seat.

What else? We live by a mosque, and if we're home around one of the 5 times they do call to prayer, we can hear the music from it. It's so cool! It really reminds me I'm in a foreign country...even though they have mosques in America too haha. The music is beautiful. Last week, I put a carton of 30 eggs in my backpack and biked home without breaking a single one. I'm getting really good at hauling groceries home on my bike. I have yet to try mangosteen or durian, but I have been eating lots of dragonfruit. I also have our phone every other day, and some days I have the keys. I love calling members and investigators and trying to confirm appointments in my broken Malay. Just so you know, the Malaysia mission phones are so archaic. I miss my qwerty keyboard, but my phone has T9 bahasa Melayu which is pretty cool. The Singapore missionaries have really nice touch screen phones. Pampered much? I have a picture with one of the APs and we're holding up our phones so you can see the difference. For a while, I was feeling pretty bummed because I teaching in lessons about 10% of the time, but I started saying things when there was an appropriate pause because I know the lessons, even if I don't say things perfectly. I talked to Sister LeBaron about it and now we have our lessons where I try and teach most of it, and she fills in whatever I forget or can't say. Usually, I just forget a word here and there. I'm learning a lot of Malay this way, and I really appreciate that Sister LeBaron is taking a backseat on the lessons so I can speak more. I've also been filling out the area book (whoever doesn't have the phone that day does the area book) and I've decided I never, ever want to be a bad area book keeper. It's so frustrating when there's not enough information or complete information on the teaching records. But it's okay, we figure if there's something we don't know, we just ask our investigator. It just makes a lot more work.

Kusnadi is slowly giving up cigarettes. Kami percaya kepada dia! He's doing great. I showed him a picture I have of Gerrit and talked about how he wanted to stop smoking so he could serve a mission, and with the help of the Atonement, he was able to do it. I also had time to show him all of my other family pictures and he loved it. He showed us his little bag of kidney stones that he had about a year ago. I've learned not to be afraid to promise people these huge promises, like if Kusnadi relies on Christ and understands it's okay if he messes up, he will be able to stop smoking. We also promised that girl, the one who takes care of all those kids, that she will be able to read one day. We are slowly teaching her. I almost cried in one of our lessons with her because her 18 month old started crying and wouldn't stop, and she told us he was hungry but she didn't have enough milk for him and her newborn. She lights up every time we stop by and talk to her, even if it's just for a couple minutes.

I went on exchanges with Sister Noorda last week, and I got to be "Senior Companion." I learned a lot from her. She only has a month left before she goes home, but she said the mission goes fast. Live up every day, and love quickly. Sometimes you don't have time to love slowly, so love your comps, investigators, and church members in each area quickly. It's easy enough because Malaysians love me so much, even though I can barely speak to them. I've been really good at conveying love to everyone I meet though. It's a language everyone speaks, because love comes from the spirit.

We had a great jungle adventure last P-Day. Our branch mission leader, Kevin, who served in Singapore, took us to a national park and we got to see beautiful waterfalls, huge ants, and lots of pokok (trees). The hike was hard, but so fun. We climbed up this sketchy wooden treehouse tower where the ladder at the bottom was broken. We didn't climb to the top though because I don't think it was built for 7 huge American kids to climb all at once. We also ran into a couple Australians, an Englishman, and a New Zealander who were in Malaysia for work, as divers and surveyors. We tried to talk more about what we did as missionaries, but the conversation never went there. As they were leaving, I had this thought to read a scripture to them, but I didn't act on it. For the rest of the hike, I kept apologizing and praying in my head that I would find them again. We did at the end of the hike, and I talked to Peter, from New Zealand (bonus: he was pretty cute), and Merrick, from Liverpool, who kept making jibes at me for trying to proselyte. He said "So are you going to try to preach to me now? And I said, "You better believe it!" I read them Mosiah 18:9 and we said our good-byes.

Kevin also took us to a replica of an Iban longhouse, and to downtown Miri for lunch.

I think I forgot to mention, before we left the MTC, the Indos and Malays sang the National Anthem. It was so pretty because a couple people knew the harmonies. I love my country. I also love my mission country. I am in love with Malaysia. Also, for our last district meeting, I read Alma 17:12-13, which reads, "And it came to pass that the hearts of the sons of Mosiah, and also those who were with them, took courage to go forth among the [Malaysians] to declare unto them the word of God.

And it came to pass when they had arrived in the borders of the land of [Malaysia], that they separated themselves one from another, trusting in the Lord that they should meet again at the close of their harvest; for they supposed that great was the work which they had undertaken."

I said I was probably the most vocal about missing my MTC district, but we were going on to do amazing things, and I was glad I got to get to know all of them, and that they needed to remember they were men of God, worthy priesthood holders. Of course, I almost cried, but I held it together enough for me to say what was in my heart. We are doing a great work. I sometimes wonder how each Elder is doing, but I know each one is being an exceptional missionary right now.

Some days, I know angels are carrying me and my bike over the bridge across the Miri river at night, because some days I'm so tired. The church is true. The Gospel of Jesus Christ changes lives. I didn't always know that, but now that I do, I have to act on it. I wouldn't be here 8,000 miles away from you all if it wasn't true. I love the work. I love my God. I love my Savior. Talk to you next week.

Sayang,

Sister Wynn

Miri Boleh!

Apa khabar friends and family,

This week, I got chased by dogs, rode my bike in the pouring rain (Malaysian rain, the kind that goes in every direction, not the American kind), fell on a rusty fence and got a little puncture wound on my knee (thank goodness for tetanus shots right?), almost fell in garbage water but saved myself with my foot, so only my shoe got nasty, and we knocked on an Iban' couple's door but they were on drugs and scared us away but the woman also did a nice Iban dance for us from a distance. My legs are also covered in mosquito bites and I have bruises I don't remember getting.

I know it sounds like I'm complaining, but I am having the time of my life. Missionary work is the hardest, funnest, most rewarding thing I've ever experienced. Everything is so worth it. The trick is to embrace the chaos of it all.

I'm glad no one told me how hard missionary work actually is. Actually, I think everyone tried to tell me, but I was too naive and excited to listen. There's this giant bridge we cross every day from our house to our area, and it's on an incline. It never gets easier to cross in the mornings, but at night, we somehow push through, get up the hill, and coast all the way back to our house. I always say a little prayer of thanks for our selamat jalan on that bridge. Biking on the busy 4-lane highways (they're the equivalent of Commercial street in Salem, but with no hippie bike lanes) is surprisingly safe. Most of the cars slow down or move out of our way and I feel pretty safe. I also learned where all of the bumps, potholes, and gravel spots are in the neighborhoods in our area by now. The only thing I hate about my mission is how much the men cat-call us as we ride our bikes! They're either in their cars and call out the window, or on their mopeds, or on the streets, and every time they do it I feel sick. Ugh. But again, it's worth it to be in this beautiful city.

Last Preparation Day, after I emailed you, we went to Parkson's, a shopping center with a bowling alley, and bowled with the Miri 2nd branch so we could get to know them better. Even though I could barely speak to any of them, I had fun and I laughed with them when we all got gutter balls, and I would high-five them if one of us got a strike. On our way there, that's when it rained, so it took us an hour to get there when it normally would have taken us 30 minutes. That's what you get when you bike through 6 inches of water. We showed up soaking wet, like we had just jumped in a river or something. I looked at the scoreboards and learned the ward member's names as they bowled. Tricky, right? It's so important in missionary work to get the members on your side. If they like you, they will help you find their friends and families who they want to have the gospel. If they don't think you're working hard, and especially if you don't make an effort to learn their names, then of course they aren't going to have you teach their loved ones. One important thing I learned in the MTC is you want the Elders in your district to like you so they take you on jungle adventures, you want the senior missionary couples to like you so they feed you and give you rides to places, and you want the ward members to like you. But you DON'T want your investigators to like you too much. You want them to have a testimony of Christ, not of missionaries. There are a couple women we tried to contact, but they don't want to be taught anymore because a Sister missionary from a couple transfers ago was teaching her and she left. That's frustrating. Sister LeBaron and I are trying really hard to make sure we don't get too close, and that our investigators have good friends at church.

Ngian loves learning from us. She is a tiny Iban woman, and the first couple lessons with her, when she spoke, I kept thinking "Wow, I can't understand any Malay at all!" But it turns out she was speaking Malay mixed with a lot of Iban. She's been teaching us some Iban words. Like the word for food is makai, and the word for drink is mirup. We taught a couple lessons at Sister Tungalim's house (I'll send a picture with a little girl sitting in front of a wooden house, that's her house) and they made us Sarawak food! They made us these little shrimp crackers that were deep fried. We watched them make it in Tungalim's kitchen. It was a scene I'll never forget: this tiny little kitchen where my head almost touches the ceiling, and you can see the lake behind her house and though the cracks between the floorboards, and there was this little skinny orange cat sleeping on their floor. We also had Family Home Evening with them (Malam Keluarga) and since it was at night, we did it by candle light in their sweet little home. Ngian's neighbors harass her for taking the lessons from us though. They leave her broom at the top of her stairs to try and make her trip and fall down the stairs, and they call her a devil worshipper. It makes me so sad and angry. But we remind her that God loves her and will never forget about her, and she is His daughter. She doesn't seem too phased though.  Kusnadi is doing well too. We are helping him to stop smoking. He and his sons came to church for all three hours yesterday (instead of just 1 like last week) although he had to leave Sunday school a couple times to smoke. We also visited this one house that was in a state of chaos yesterday. This woman
lives in a housing complex and has one daughter, but she takes care of all of the kids who live there. There are like 20 kids and a million puppies running around, and the guys are always smoking like chimneys and we heard they're always drunk at night. We want to turn it all around. One of the guys, who is 17, took a Book of Mormon from me because I was reading a verse to the woman and he helped me finish reading, and I ended up giving it to him. He seemed pretty interested. It was amazing to see their countenances change when we talked about our message of hope.

Anyway, I'm out of time. We only gave ourselves an hour to email since our jungle adventure ran late.

I love you all. The church is true!

Kasih,

Sister Ellen Wynn