Well I'm depressed (in the sons-of-Mosiah sense of the word and not the clinical sense) but like always, how would I grow if the mission was easy? The work here is HARD and I've been feeling so inadequate lately so I'm not going to talk about that stuff. Luckily Sister Opatha is way good about picking me back up.
I had my interview with President Mains this week. I didn't have the heart to tell him I miss Malaysia and rather told him I hope he knows he can send me anywhere and put me with any companion and I'll make it work somehow. I meant it but as I said it my heart kind of had this sinking feeling and I wondered to myself why I'm so self-sabotaging.
He and Sister Mains attended our ward with their son yesterday, and I don't know why it was so weird for me to see them as normal church-goers. I think it's because they're in Malaysia half the time. It's weird that they actually live in our ward. Elder Ferguson dubs our ward "the fat ward," not because the members are fat (in fact, they're all actually pretty beautiful and insanely successful temporally and spiritually) but because the missionaries who serve here get fat off of all of the incredible food the members make for us. For those of you who were concerned about my health, know that all the good American (and Mexican) food they're feeding me is plumping me right back up. We also noticed that all four of us missionaries are skinny as twigs, so it's a good thing we're here.
We had a zone activity on Thursday evening called "The Singapore South Zone Blitz." We all met up at City Hall, went on exchanges, and conquered the nation. Sister Proffit and I walked and talked to incredibly prepared people and found ourselves all the way by Little India and Bugis. I thought it was cool that we knew the city well enough to feel our way back using the buses. We met up with our zone again, and Elder Harr and Elder Anderson took us to this field that was surrounded by all the skyscrapers in the business district of Singapore. It was night time by then and it was so beautiful. We sat and talked about all the miracles we saw that night and committed ourselves to being more bold in talking to everyone.
I talked to a really sweet Melayu lady and she told me my Malay was good and that I had an Indonesian accent, but it's good because it's more polite-sounding. Sister Anderson also told me all of the members in Kota Sentosa branch said I had really good Malay. Mana ada, because I feel like my Malay is still pretty mediocre, but I'll take it.
I had a couple cool spiritual experiences this week that I won't go into too much detail about. For our district meeting, Elder McCarthy asked us to think about the weakest part of our testimony, then to study and pray about it for a few minutes, and then boldly testify of it in front of everyone. I was already trying not to cry when it was my turn, but I stood up and said with all the conviction I had that I know God numbers His people, and that the Atonement of Jesus Christ applies to everyone, not just the members of His church. We all felt pretty vulnerable but it was one of those experiences where we felt closer.
I was praying one night to be more Christlike, and thought of all the missionaries I admired and how frustrated I was that I am a little irreverent. But then I had this thought that I can still be Christlike and lighthearted, that I can still be kind and laugh a little loud, and I know that thought didn't just come from myself. I was grateful for the feeling that I was doing all things better than I thought I was.
One of the fun things about serving in Singapore is I get to meet some of the most fascinating people. One of my favorites this week is this Indian lady we talk to every once in a while. She hangs out at the bar called "Bojangles" by the church, and she's really fair-skinned. I didn't even know she was Indian until she told me because she speaks almost perfect English. She just sits outside of the bar most days, sipping a beer. In one of my conversations with her, she told us all about how she learned at a Catholic school by Irish nuns, and about how she's lived all over the world. She commended us for our missionary work and said, "You girls are doing a damn good job."
I had to chuckle a little and was grateful that at least somebody was kind to us.
Yesterday at church, our potential investigator who was invited by another mom had a good experience, so hopefully that'll turn into something. Thank goodness for awesome member missionaries. As Sister Opatha, Elder McCarthy, Elder Andrus and I go around strengthening the members, we realize how busy they are but we're grateful they're trying to share the gospel with their friends (a hint to all of you guys back home). Also, watch out for that ebola.
xo Sister Wynn
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